M.O.E.S. is a framework I came up with that helped me go from emotional reaction to intentional action, and it can do the same for you.
Metacognitive: thinking about your thinking. Notice what your mind is doing so you know how to steer it.
Why it matters: It gives you space to choose instead of just reacting.
Observe: take a step back to notice triggers, patterns, body language, and recurring thoughts.
Why it matters: It allows you to turn emotions into information, instead of guesswork.
Evolve: learn from what happened, then practice changing your response or action. Small daily shifts help you come back steadier.
Why it matters: It’s how internal change becomes visible.
Sustain: Where you plan and build new habits that you’ll apply to daily life.
Why it matters:Unlike single moments of effort, a plan or strategy helps results last.
Metacognition is “thinking about your thinking.” I took those principles beyond the classroom and applied them, with a 10-step system, into trauma, adversity, and identity recovery. M.A.F. isn’t just learning-it’s unlearning, healing, and building a life on purpose.
I’ve applied my story in the 10 step M.A.F., as an example of how I used it and how you can apply it.
M.O.E.S. is a framework I came up with that helped me go from emotional reaction to intentional action, and it can do the same for you.
Metacognitive– thinking about your thinking. Notice what your mind is doing so you know how to steer it.
Why it matters: This gives you the space to choose, instead of just reacting.
Observe– this is stepping back to see your recurring thoughts, your triggers, body language, and patterns.
Why it matters: this allows you to turn emotions into information, so you’re not going off of guess work.
Evolve– You learn from what happened and then practice changing your response or action. Small daily shifts help you come back steadier.
Why it matters: This is where internal change becomes visible.
Sustain– This is where you plan and build new habits that you’ll apply daily to every part of life.
Why it matters: having a plan or strategy make results stick and grow, unlike single moments of effort.
Metacognition is “thinking about your thinking.” I took those principles beyond the classroom and applied them, with a 10-step system, into trauma, adversity, and identity recovery. M.A.F. isn’t just learning-it’s unlearning, healing, and building a life on purpose.
I’ve applied my story in the 10 step M.A.F., as an example of how I used it and how you can apply it.
•Catching your thoughts before they play out
•Building emotional awareness & regulation
•Building healthier coping mechanisms
•Taking back control
•It’s simple
•It’s structured (not generic Advice) •My coaching comes from what I’ve lived
Certificates in:
•Psychology
•CBT Practitioner training (Accredited) •TESOL: Language Pedagogy
•C2 Proficient
English-only lessons are available
•Build confidence without pressure
•Focused on conversational practice,
not grammar drills
•Build fluency and expand vocabulary
First 2 sessions free
Bundles:
4 pk – $100 (1 free session)
8 pk – $180 (1 free session)
12 pk – $240 (2 free sessions)
I’m Armando Aguilera. When my daughter was born, I was in federal custody watching on a six-inch screen, then missed her first seven months before being deported to Mexico. That was the moment I made a promise to build something real that provides for her and helps others as well.
Keeping that promise wasn’t easy. Leaving everyone and everything I knew was painful. There were days when stress, depression, and doubt felt like they’d consume me. I was dying mentally, I had reduced gray matter and brain inflammation, doctor said I was really close to being that guy on the corner talking to himself. what saved me from that was the reading I was doing. barely. while stress and depression were breaking down my brain, the reading was quietly helping rebuild it.
Still, I felt like i was slipping, until one question changed everything: “Do you want another man raising your daughter?” It flipped a switch. It reminded me of the promise I made and the choice I had-give into despair or fight for the future my daughter deserves. Years of suppressed emotions hit me at once, and I turned it into fuel for determination not anger. I wasn’t gonna be an absent father, I was determined to fix myself at all costs, and that meant facing every demon I’d avoided for years because of addiction and fear of change. Growing up without a father and seeing how emotions were handled at home shaped me more than I knew. I decided the cycle stops here. My daughter will not carry the same pain. Generational trauma ends with me.
Just as I came out of the most difficult season of my life, another storm hit. On May 3rd 2025, my sister Vanessa-the calm in my storms-was suddenly taken from us. She was the person I called when life felt heavy, and she always answered. I couldn’t be there for her services and I was denied humanitarian parole at the border. It shattered me within, but carrying my daughter that day reminded me why I keep fighting. Her loss left a void I’ll carry forever. Because of Vanessa’s love and support, I created this space for anyone who needs a listening ear. In her memory, I’ll have one Free Check-In Day each month. Just a way to pass on what she gave me that keeps her memory alive.
I was built through adversity, now I’m driven by purpose, to help others take back control, protect their inner peace, and move with intention.
Growing up Vanessa was always showing love in everyday ways. Cooking, washing, and ironing clothes. When we were teens, she wasn’t allowed to go out alone, so I’d always go with her. It was my way of showing appreciation for all she did. Looking back, those nights were like a quiet promise between us:
“I’ve got you, like you’ve always had me”
As years went by she never changed. Everywhere she went, she brought laughter and joy. We were always joking around. No matter what she was dealing with, she’d never let it show. When life felt heavy, I could call her, and she’d always answer. Our conversations always began the same way:
Me: Hey sis, what are you doing?
Her: Not much, just here at home.
Me: Oh, ok. Then why haven’t you checked in?
no matter what she’d say she was doing, I’d flip it and turn it into
“well why haven’t you checked in?”
That question became my lifeline down here in Mexico. Through her I learned that sometimes people just need someone who listens, who cares, who shows up, no judgment, just support Because everyone deserves what she gave me.
Life has been quieter since she passed, but that doesn’t mean our connection is gone. I dream of her often, and I’ve realized that’s because my mind and heart had gotten used to communicating with her from afar. Those dreams are her way of checking in and my way of keeping the connection alive. I love you sis.
September 20, 1987-May 3, 2025
